Enough is Enough.( ;)
I have talked about starting a business for years! I'd even given it a shot a couple of years ago, but it didn't take off. I'm under the impression I simply didn't want it enough.
On my last go around I was a full time, salaried employee at a job I LOVED!!! (despite one or two... or maybe just the one, super annoying coworker.) I chatted with my folks about it and played with a logo idea in my down time but that is about as far as I took it.
I married the man of my dreams, moved from Nevada to North Carolina (enter culture shocked face here) and was thrust into the world of the Military. Now you can watch Army Wives as much as you want but that will not even remotely prepare you for life as a military spouse. It is safe to say I have had an extremely hard time getting my footing.
This year, 2015, everything changed. Ok, so maybe everything changed on the last day of 2014 in one of the last possible hours, (9:17 if you're picky), but regardless, everything changed. My husband and I welcomed our beautiful baby girl into the world. At this time in my career I was a Realtor with, in my opinion, the BEST company in Fayetteville. I loved working with my clients. I loved helping them buy new homes and even sell their old homes. It's a very special part of someone's life to be a part of. However, I found I'd spend more time than necessary working on open house and new listing flyers, I continuosly offered to help fellow agents with their websites and I wanted to learn more about how to grow my business through social media. I slowly began to realize I loved being a realtor but I would always love marketing more.
At 6 weeks old my husband and I placed our daughter into daycare and I went back to work. We found ourselves with two working parents, a daycare bill and only one income. That's the thing about real estate. When you receive a commission it is awesome, but in between sales it can be difficult. When it was just my husband and I, that was fine, but after being less active my 9th month of pregnancy and maternity leave I felt as if I was trying to build my business all over again and, unfortunately we couldn't afford to build a business and have our daughter in a full time daycare at the same time. So, we made the decision for me to be a stay at home mom. Best decision I've ever made! Watching my daughter grow and change day by day is such a blessing. Don't get me wrong, she gives me a run for my money, but she's a hoot.
Over the last 8 months I have done a lot of thinking about being a stay at home mom and whether or not I wanted to return to work after her 1st birthday. A couple months back, my parents asked me to build a website for their property management company. My father is fully capable of designing one, but with his full time job and me being at home, I am fairly certain they wanted to give me a task to help retain my sanity during nap time ;)
I began discussing it with my husband and my parents and decided I would give this "start a business" thing another shot. And here we are. I spent the whole day designing a website design for LAK Communications. I'm stuck between LAK Communications and NV to NC Media (or Marketing). Nevertheless, it's been an eventful day :). I finally feel like I have a plan!
I know I'm going to have to work on this, the blog, the social media posts, getting the word out there, but I also, finally, understand I can not and should not get frustrated when it doesn't happen overnight, or even in the first 6 months. Wish me luck!
Thursday, December 3, 2015
Sunday, January 19, 2014
Country Road; Radio Blasting.
Over the past couple of weeks I have been coming to a number of realizations. I know it seems cheesy since it's the new year and all, but for the first time in a long time I have an idea of who I want to be, what has been causing the down times in my life and what I need to do to change them.
Well today, for the second day in a row, after I woke up and brought the boys outside to go to the bathroom, I went back in my room to find out my terrior peed in my bed. Two nights in a row! Needless to say, this was kind of the straw that broke the camels back for me. I love my dogs dearly, but some days I just want to kill them, or give them up or something, but I know in my heart I can't do that.
I threw the sheets and pillow case in the wash, had a mini meltdown, put Dixie in the kennel and the boys in the car. I had planned on taking them for a walk and didn't want myself and the shepards to miss out just because I was angry with the little lady.
When we started our drive I wasn't quite sure where I wanted to go. I just drove. I decided to head towards Weymouth Woods, a park I take the dogs to sometimes because there is rarely anyone there. Once I got onto the backroad I rolled my windows down (even though it was pretty cold), tuned the heater on my feet, and blasted some of my favorite songs from highschool while singing at the top of my lungs. By the second song, my head ache was completely gone. I'd forgotten how relazing it is to sing at the top of my lungs, regardless of whether or not I know the lyrics; no cares in the world. It was amazing.
It's about a 30-40 minute drive to the woods, yet it still seemed like not enough time. We pulled into the parking lot, the boys went crazy and I put in my headphones, playing the same playlist I had previously been rocking out to. It is amazing how relazing the songs from my past can be. I started to jog down one of the many paths and felt free. Now, knowing me, my currently jogging skills have increased, however, I can't jog/run for more than 3 minutes without my lungs or knee acting up. If one of those hadn't stopped me, the boys innate need to sniff EVERYTHING definitely slowed things down. For the first time, I didn't mind. I didn't care how many calories I was burning and I didn't want to jerk them and yell and get frustrated with them sniffing everything and being on opposite sides of the trail. Normally this drives me insane, but I decided this was as much their vacation as it was mine.
On the way home I went the backway again. I love it. No stop signs, maybe 20 cars the whole time, 55 mph speed limit, and free. It felt so nice to sing again. I felt carefree for that 2 hour period.
I hope throughout 2014 I continue to reevaluate and revitalize my life.
Well today, for the second day in a row, after I woke up and brought the boys outside to go to the bathroom, I went back in my room to find out my terrior peed in my bed. Two nights in a row! Needless to say, this was kind of the straw that broke the camels back for me. I love my dogs dearly, but some days I just want to kill them, or give them up or something, but I know in my heart I can't do that.
I threw the sheets and pillow case in the wash, had a mini meltdown, put Dixie in the kennel and the boys in the car. I had planned on taking them for a walk and didn't want myself and the shepards to miss out just because I was angry with the little lady.
When we started our drive I wasn't quite sure where I wanted to go. I just drove. I decided to head towards Weymouth Woods, a park I take the dogs to sometimes because there is rarely anyone there. Once I got onto the backroad I rolled my windows down (even though it was pretty cold), tuned the heater on my feet, and blasted some of my favorite songs from highschool while singing at the top of my lungs. By the second song, my head ache was completely gone. I'd forgotten how relazing it is to sing at the top of my lungs, regardless of whether or not I know the lyrics; no cares in the world. It was amazing.
It's about a 30-40 minute drive to the woods, yet it still seemed like not enough time. We pulled into the parking lot, the boys went crazy and I put in my headphones, playing the same playlist I had previously been rocking out to. It is amazing how relazing the songs from my past can be. I started to jog down one of the many paths and felt free. Now, knowing me, my currently jogging skills have increased, however, I can't jog/run for more than 3 minutes without my lungs or knee acting up. If one of those hadn't stopped me, the boys innate need to sniff EVERYTHING definitely slowed things down. For the first time, I didn't mind. I didn't care how many calories I was burning and I didn't want to jerk them and yell and get frustrated with them sniffing everything and being on opposite sides of the trail. Normally this drives me insane, but I decided this was as much their vacation as it was mine.
On the way home I went the backway again. I love it. No stop signs, maybe 20 cars the whole time, 55 mph speed limit, and free. It felt so nice to sing again. I felt carefree for that 2 hour period.
I hope throughout 2014 I continue to reevaluate and revitalize my life.
Saturday, January 18, 2014
Good Old Fashioned Catholic Guilt
Growing up I was "that girl". I was shy. I was quiet. I was reserved. I wanted to be outspoken and crazy but it never seemed to fit quite right, so instead I was the "goody two shoes". I never really had a problem with it. I loved church. I loved God. I loved religion. I loved mass. I loved Catholicism. I loved singing. I loved me.
Being naïve was always a little bit annoying. I rarely had any idea what was going on after everyone hit puberty. Although I mastered he convincing laugh to inappropriate jokes, I didn't start getting them until I was about 19 and, well, lets be honest, I still don't know what people are talking about half the time. My "x-rated" knowledge seems to be a lot of peoples "PG-13 rated" knowledge. Just the other day some folks were talking and I asked a friend what something meant and she just laughed and said "Oh lauren." Most people seem to want to keep me as naïve as possible. There is the occasional person who resembles my high school ex-boyfriend's brother that wants to tell me every inappropriate thing in the universe, but those people seem to be dwindeling as we get older.
I didn't swear until I was in college, and even know, I say it out of habit, but I still feel guilty.
Many days I miss the girl I used to be. The thing is, I kind of like the girl I am now. I like being able to speak my mind a little more and not always blend into the wall. However, I can tell the self-conscious, naïve person is still with me.
Nearly everyday the thought crosses my mind "how do I get back to her?" How does sinner mesh with the do-gooder. Growing up I rarely sinned, in fact, I can't think of a time when I did anything more than lie to my mom about cleaning my room. I was so terrified of upsetting God and disappointing myself. My senior year of high school my life changed, everything changed. As much as I still loved the Lord, I lost faith in my church. I'm not sure I've ever written or said that out loud before, but I lost faith in my church. Instead of choir being led by a volunteer from the congregation they hired someone who wasn't even Catholic. my ex-boyfriend still participated in the band even though he no longer believed in the religion. People started wearing sweats to church instead of dresses or nice dress suits. Among these were a plethora of other changes and I started to realize the old fashioned Roman Catholic Church I grew up in, the one I knew and loved, the one that defined me, was gone.
I tried to hang in, but I was so strict and felt like everything was wrong. I sang in the choir an participated as an alter sever until I started at the university. I began attending church less and less. At school I was introduced to alcohol, I had more people willing to explain those things to me that turned my cheeks red, curse words were more popular than in grade school and I began to sin. I felt guilty about it at first, terribly, terribly guilty. After a while some things became habit. A night out with the girls with alcohol, a minor curse word here and there; I could feel myself turning, but every step of the way the quit, naïve, church mouse from my past was echoing through my mind.
I want to go back to church. I want to sing again. I want to feel care free and good again. When I go to a church I feel out of place, nothing seems quite right and I feel like a heathen. I know deep down in my heart that the two sides of myself could potential merge into one unified being and I could stop feeling so guilty, and start being more ... "me", but I often wonder "Have I strayed to far?"
Being naïve was always a little bit annoying. I rarely had any idea what was going on after everyone hit puberty. Although I mastered he convincing laugh to inappropriate jokes, I didn't start getting them until I was about 19 and, well, lets be honest, I still don't know what people are talking about half the time. My "x-rated" knowledge seems to be a lot of peoples "PG-13 rated" knowledge. Just the other day some folks were talking and I asked a friend what something meant and she just laughed and said "Oh lauren." Most people seem to want to keep me as naïve as possible. There is the occasional person who resembles my high school ex-boyfriend's brother that wants to tell me every inappropriate thing in the universe, but those people seem to be dwindeling as we get older.
I didn't swear until I was in college, and even know, I say it out of habit, but I still feel guilty.
Many days I miss the girl I used to be. The thing is, I kind of like the girl I am now. I like being able to speak my mind a little more and not always blend into the wall. However, I can tell the self-conscious, naïve person is still with me.
Nearly everyday the thought crosses my mind "how do I get back to her?" How does sinner mesh with the do-gooder. Growing up I rarely sinned, in fact, I can't think of a time when I did anything more than lie to my mom about cleaning my room. I was so terrified of upsetting God and disappointing myself. My senior year of high school my life changed, everything changed. As much as I still loved the Lord, I lost faith in my church. I'm not sure I've ever written or said that out loud before, but I lost faith in my church. Instead of choir being led by a volunteer from the congregation they hired someone who wasn't even Catholic. my ex-boyfriend still participated in the band even though he no longer believed in the religion. People started wearing sweats to church instead of dresses or nice dress suits. Among these were a plethora of other changes and I started to realize the old fashioned Roman Catholic Church I grew up in, the one I knew and loved, the one that defined me, was gone.
I tried to hang in, but I was so strict and felt like everything was wrong. I sang in the choir an participated as an alter sever until I started at the university. I began attending church less and less. At school I was introduced to alcohol, I had more people willing to explain those things to me that turned my cheeks red, curse words were more popular than in grade school and I began to sin. I felt guilty about it at first, terribly, terribly guilty. After a while some things became habit. A night out with the girls with alcohol, a minor curse word here and there; I could feel myself turning, but every step of the way the quit, naïve, church mouse from my past was echoing through my mind.
I want to go back to church. I want to sing again. I want to feel care free and good again. When I go to a church I feel out of place, nothing seems quite right and I feel like a heathen. I know deep down in my heart that the two sides of myself could potential merge into one unified being and I could stop feeling so guilty, and start being more ... "me", but I often wonder "Have I strayed to far?"
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Real estate
For the past couple months I've been working on getting my real estate license. For the first time in my life I have actually failed something. Part of me thinks it may be due to Steven's training schedule, my mom visiting, my trip home and being sick for three weeks, but the other part of me just feels like a failure.
I have been taking tests and going to classes for as long as I can remember and never have I actually failed something. It may be due to having to pay for the test also. I want to start and there's this huge road block in my way... the stupid test. I knew it cost a bit to start real estate, I mean to start any career it costs a lot of money because of all the school, the problem with real estate is it's all at one time. I seem to be doing better and there aren't anymore big plans for a while so I think i'm going to trade in my study guide for the text book and start from square one.. there's got to be a way to pass this test and I want to find it.
I have been taking tests and going to classes for as long as I can remember and never have I actually failed something. It may be due to having to pay for the test also. I want to start and there's this huge road block in my way... the stupid test. I knew it cost a bit to start real estate, I mean to start any career it costs a lot of money because of all the school, the problem with real estate is it's all at one time. I seem to be doing better and there aren't anymore big plans for a while so I think i'm going to trade in my study guide for the text book and start from square one.. there's got to be a way to pass this test and I want to find it.
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Lazy Day
Today has been a day of naps, cell phone video games and a burn notice marathon. I am not proud to say I only got out of my pajamas to go with my husband to get a new battery for his key. On Sunday I fell ... in my living room ... twice, not once, but twice. I'm not even sure how but I can sure say it hurts like crazy. Apparently my feet and hardwood floors do not get along well.
Last night was pretty rough because I found out my 11-month old German Shepard is afraid of thunder... yay! Thankfully, my hubby had the day off an slept through everything last night so I was able to nap and relax today :) I love him. lol :) I even overlooked his ulterior motive ... video games and top gear, two of my least favorite things haha. We are now getting ready for bed and watching episode 7 of Burn Notice Season 6 which apparently made it's debut on Netflix and is one of the hubby's favorite shows. Unfortunately it's better than I thought it would be and my concentration is not what it should be, so I think I'll pick up my blog tomorrow morning :)
Last night was pretty rough because I found out my 11-month old German Shepard is afraid of thunder... yay! Thankfully, my hubby had the day off an slept through everything last night so I was able to nap and relax today :) I love him. lol :) I even overlooked his ulterior motive ... video games and top gear, two of my least favorite things haha. We are now getting ready for bed and watching episode 7 of Burn Notice Season 6 which apparently made it's debut on Netflix and is one of the hubby's favorite shows. Unfortunately it's better than I thought it would be and my concentration is not what it should be, so I think I'll pick up my blog tomorrow morning :)
Monday, August 12, 2013
Turning Over A New Leaf
Tonight at dinner my husband asked me why I stopped blogging and I realized it was mostly because for a really long time I felt I had nothing important to say. I realized today, however, that everything is important to me, to him, to someone and perhaps I may not be the only one feeling at that specific time. Regardless if 1 person or 1 million people read my blog I'm sure at some point there is someone who is feeling happy, loved, blessed, depressed, alone, defeated, sick, optimistic, rejuvenated, or so many other things. Therefore, I've decided to try and blog everyday.
I am currently a stay at home army wife, in search of a career. Since I moved to North Carolina I've had a terrible time finding jobs with a career path. I don't necessarily have to work but I want to. I need something that is my own and I need something to do. Being in the town we're in there's not much place for advertising. Most things are chains or mom n pop shops without advertising funds. Over the past couple months I've been working on getting my real estate license, however, I've also been very sick and haven't been able to study as I should. I took my second x-ray today and hope to figure out what is wrong with me so I can put 100% of me into this new career path thing.
Unfortunately, I started this blog later in the night than I'd planned and I'm going to sign off to watch Kung Fu Panda on tv with my hubby until The Glades come on :). I absolutely LOVE The Glades! If anyone hasn't watched it and loves crime shoes with a bit of drama, sarcasm and attitude, it may be the show for you!
I am currently a stay at home army wife, in search of a career. Since I moved to North Carolina I've had a terrible time finding jobs with a career path. I don't necessarily have to work but I want to. I need something that is my own and I need something to do. Being in the town we're in there's not much place for advertising. Most things are chains or mom n pop shops without advertising funds. Over the past couple months I've been working on getting my real estate license, however, I've also been very sick and haven't been able to study as I should. I took my second x-ray today and hope to figure out what is wrong with me so I can put 100% of me into this new career path thing.
Unfortunately, I started this blog later in the night than I'd planned and I'm going to sign off to watch Kung Fu Panda on tv with my hubby until The Glades come on :). I absolutely LOVE The Glades! If anyone hasn't watched it and loves crime shoes with a bit of drama, sarcasm and attitude, it may be the show for you!
Monday, February 11, 2013
Rainy Days
So the hubby left this morning for another field exercise, I am so happy I have to guard puppies and an alarm system. At first I was really disappointing we were going to be spending our first (out of 6) Valentine's in the same zip code apart AGAIN, but no i'm over it. Mandi, Willow and I are going to go to New Bern, home of lots of exploring, Nicholas Sparks, and a fish market and I'm pretty excited about it.
We are definitely settling in to our life a little more. Zeus is getting better with everyone and Baxter is only a spoiled brat, stealing toys 3/4 of the time instead of all of the time. We've gotten our house unpacked, had a Superbowl party and had Mandi and Willow over for dinner so it almost feels like a real home, we are almost there. All we need now is grass and our dog run! I can't wait for our dog run. We got it in the mail last week, however, the box was all torn up and one of the pieces was bent. After a long talk on the phone, and a complaining UPS driver we got the first one "exchanged" and have a new one on the way. I wanted to have one up before the trip Thursday, but i'm not sure if i want to do it by myself lol, that is if it even gets here before then.
We are definitely settling in to our life a little more. Zeus is getting better with everyone and Baxter is only a spoiled brat, stealing toys 3/4 of the time instead of all of the time. We've gotten our house unpacked, had a Superbowl party and had Mandi and Willow over for dinner so it almost feels like a real home, we are almost there. All we need now is grass and our dog run! I can't wait for our dog run. We got it in the mail last week, however, the box was all torn up and one of the pieces was bent. After a long talk on the phone, and a complaining UPS driver we got the first one "exchanged" and have a new one on the way. I wanted to have one up before the trip Thursday, but i'm not sure if i want to do it by myself lol, that is if it even gets here before then.
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